I feel this woman pain, while I am lucky I don’t have an ex-wife to deal with, I do feel her struggles to my core. I want the best for my family, I love each of them endlessly. We officially joined our family’s when we got married less than a year ago, and since then we’ve very little progress. Now for me it feels like progress has been made, but from an outsider looking in it probably looks like I’m not even trying. I hold back is I know all to well what having a step-parent enter you’re life feels like. My stepson was only five when we got married, but none the less he’s old enough to know who he does and doesn’t want in is life and how much attention he does and doesn’t want from certain people. So I have safely kept my distance and eased myself into his life. My standoffish behavior isn’t because I don’t care about him, it’s because of the endless love I have for him that I never want to push myself into his life. I want him to feel like he has the choice of how much I apart of his life. I’m sure to some people this seems dumb, with he being five I should have jumped right in and tested the waters, sharing my love and mothering comfort with him. But no I put my foot one toe at a time into the water, to ease into it. I just simply can’t bring myself to make someone feel like I’m being forced into their life, 6 or 25. If that makes me seem cold hearted, a bad mother or just plain mean then so be it. But everyone is only an outsider to the situation and there for has no idea what it actually happening in our family. I’m confident that in time we will grow to be close, it’s just going to take longer then other people’s standers perhaps.